Jane Bond - Waterloo 🇨🇦

 As I'm writing this, I am sipping on a gallon of tea and fighting a (albeit losing) battle that would rival the Somme with a vicious hangover. Foolishly, I lied to myself and said I wasn't going to drink last night "maybe two pints and then I'll be on the near beers and go home". However, no man is an island and whilst I’m certainly no plenipotentiary, I am one to make executive decisions when called upon. So, some pour decisions were made, beers were consumed, and a hotel room was booked at 1:40am, but we couldn't not. Because last night was a special occasion. Last night was the Saigon Hookers farewell forever show, and sadly much to my chagrin, this isn't a KISS farewell either, this was farewell, goodbye, so long, adios, adjø!

For those unfamiliar with the Hookers, simply put, hand on heart, they're one of the greatest rock n roll bands of all time. No frills, no gimmicks, no nonsense, just 5 dudes playing great songs and havin’ a damn good time doing it. Listen to "Feel Like Murder" or "Truth, No Reason" and you'll get a taste of what I'm talking about. Unless you've read any of these blogs in brail, you'll know that I have a profound love and respect for many things, but mostly shortbread biscuits and rock n roll. I say the same thing about Napalm Death or GWAR as I do the Hookers, because I love the notion that 5 guys will dedicate so much time, effort, and energy into something that only a select few people will truly love and appreciate. That to me is the most rock n roll thing of all. 

The dictionary defines rock n roll as "popular music usually played on electrically amplified instruments" and that's great. I’m sure Dr. Johnson would be proud, but to some, it’s so much more than that. I think one of the most important parts about rock n roll is its imperfections. I don't want it to be perfect. I want it to be loud and in your face, it comes with an attitude that's supposed to make you feel something. Something primal, something that sends a chill down your spine, or puts a smile on your face. It's like how Clarkson talks about how the rumble of a Lancia Coupé can become more than just 6 cylinders, seats and a steering wheel. How it can become a mate, something that has humanlike characteristics and therefore isn’t perfect. Let's face it, we're all flawed in one way or another. To me, rock n roll transcends all the imperfections and the bullshit of life, it doesn't discriminate, and it won't judge you for eating meat on Good Friday or for working on the sabbath. In my mind a belief in anything else is heresy.

After the Hookers played a massive set that spanned all 20 glorious years of their career, we drank the club dry and oozed into Jane Bond for a farewell party of epic proportions. This shoebox sized dive bar was filled with more denim, lace and leather than these local college kids could handle. I've said plenty of unsavoury things about DJs in my time, but for tonight, the DJ was perfect and the drinks were ice cold. Jane Bond was the perfect send off for one of the most perfectly imperfect rock n roll bands I’ve been lucky enough to know. Smokes, Gunns, Lee, Ron & Paul, thank you for all the bangovers, the hearing damage, the laughs, the cigarettes, the great times listening to your bloody music, just thank you forever.

The only question that remains to be answered in my lifetime then is there a better song than "Panama"? Because I've yet to hear it.

6/6.

#RIP Saigon Hookers 2005-2025.